Sunday morning--the last Sunday before retirement.  My head and heart are too full to sort out.  I miss teaching.  Even though I have been on sick leave and wage continuance for almost 2 months, I feel THE DAY approaching like a kiss or a bite.  How long will I know that the students are in my 3-4 class or that it is 11th lunch or poetry club?  How long until I know about surgery?  How long can I work on what I have saved to do When I Retire before I have to earn money again?  Why am I instead looking forward to the next incarnation of teaching--tutoring and editing?  THE DAY could be the hug of a bridge between two continents rather than the violence of a kiss/bite.  I may stand on the bridge to watch a few days turn around.

It's been a Long Time . . .

I haven't so much as opened this page in years! 

At the risk of embarrassment, I will leave the ancient posts.  It was Marsha's Blog that brought me here, simply because I wanted to leave a comment on her influential Ferlinghetti post! 

Because I am here, I will leave my latest poem--a harsh one--but approved by the FLC Poetry Club.  I love the years I spent with them.  No regrets.

Waiting

See, it’s like this:
If I were going to hit you  You would be flat on the floor already Or smeared in print on yesterday’s front page. There is no waiting in my world At least, not without a cigarette And I quit the day I retired. This is my time, see And I don’t have the time or the money for waiting And I don’t have time for old habits I don’t have money to burn Retired is the wrong word for now I am de-tired and de-livered With what I know and what I must learn I was never good at waiting for And have spent way too much time doing it As if it earned interest in a hidden bank of the future But I looked in that hopeful vault yesterday And there God’s voice echoed what I had not heard And lists of to-do-laters fluttered in the empty breath So, you see, time is now.

By Susan L. Chast
12 February 2012

     I am writing here only once a year, so maybe it's time to admit that I am not a blogger.  Last school year was an intense one in which Philadelphia Schools settled on a contract, and our school delved into project-based, real-world learning while striving to deliver the test practice that helped us achieve AYP.  This year we returned to find a new organization of three deans instead of two and more technology to learn.  I'm ready for it.  I've been given almost all of the English 3, which implies a level of trust.  My creative writing class is running for the 4th year in a row.  I have based it mostly on Linda Christensen's Reading, Writing, and Rising Up, with a dose of Philadelphia Young Playwrights (we had a winner last year), and an even larger dose of This I Believe. 
     I'm hoping to write during that class myself.  This summer, I went to Edinburgh to take a creative writing course for me--not for teaching methods.  I figured that if I couldn't write, I could attend 4 major international festivals.  Instead, I started to write seriously, fictionalizing stories I have been carrying around for years. Now I am planning to participate in a PhilWP writer's support group AND planning to attend a retreat for women writers.  Maybe continuing--starting-- this blog will be part of the writing this year.

A new year = renewed possibility

Here in Philadelphia we begin the 2009-10 session with bated breath because of challenging changes in the School District's policy for teachers. And we have no contract. For me, this means I must focus even more than usual on the classroom so that I don't feel powerless and forget why I am a teacher. I'm renewing my commitment to real-world learning and its important focus on student voices. As a first step, I am redesigning the Tapped-In classes I used last year. And again, I invite my Principal to check out and test drive the arrangements.

Forbidden chat!

So, during a classroom session on Tapped-In that I actually held IN my classroom with a cart full of MacBooks--4 were stolen. (The ins and outs of this are too complex to lay out here--except to say I rushed a sign-out procedure I should have followed and trusted a person I shouldn't have.) In the subsequent investigation, I received one and only one urgent communication from the principal: "YOU ARE TO CEASE ALL CLASS CHAT ACTIVITY IMMEDIATELY UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE." Following this edict to the letter, I have removed the chat from class. I still require the blog assignment and--on Tuesday nights (not in the classroom)--I am still on-line for homework help. I have not been given a chance to respond, nor to ask "why now?" The principal gave me one moment of explanation: No one can convince him that chat can enhance the teaching and learning of reading and writing at any grade level--elementary, junior, or senior high level! You know from this blog site, that he and I have been discussing this for almost three years, but it seems--because of the theft--now he realizes I always meant to follow through and actually use web learning. Perhaps there are more legal issues than I am aware of? I'll be back . . . .